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Three men tell their abortion stories to support abortion; Their stories have the opposite effect

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The influence of the 26 abortion narratives compiled by Meaghan Winter for a feature article in New York Magazine still reverberates.

Those who advocate for abortion rights argue that the recent case is the most prominent example of women sharing their experiences. They contend that this will contribute to the destigmatization of abortion.

Those who are pro-life examine not only these accounts but numerous others and conclude that they are not representative of the truth. At one or more levels, the majority of women experienced significant suffering. The negative aspects of abortion, which included numerous accounts of subtle and overt pressure to abort, were pervasive.

The most significant observation for me was

“When I had the ultrasound, I asked for the picture and a nurse said, ‘Seriously?’ A month later, he [the boyfriend] said he regretted it too. When I cry about it, I cry alone. He thinks it would make me sad to talk about, but I don’t want our baby to think we forgot. I’ve never heard of anybody else having an abortion here.”

However, our opponents persist in attempting to salvage something from the situation. Today, there is a piece entitled “Men Recall the Pain and Turmoil of Abortion,” which appeared on The Root. The stories in this publication are written by and for African-Americans.

The author, Jozen Cummings, was the father of a child who was aborted between his sophomore and junior years in college. Before he begins to discuss three men whose girlfriends had abortions, he makes a point of noting that his accounts are not to be confused with those of “the many men who are the enemy to abortion rights.” He then adds, in a somewhat offhand manner, that he has never forgotten the experience.

The initial narrative is, in many respects, analogous to numerous of the 26 accounts of women published in New York magazine. Chad, now 32, is candid enough to acknowledge that had he demonstrated even the slightest degree of support—for instance, by expressing his willingness to be a responsible father or even by stating his opposition to abortion—the woman in question would likely have chosen to continue with the pregnancy. Upon exiting the abortion clinic, she is observed to be in a state of emotional distress.

“I experienced nightmares intermittently for a period of time following the incident. The frequency and consistency of the dreams varied.” His father accused him of embezzling funds from an account he had established for his son. Upon confessing, Chad was not subjected to disciplinary action. He inquired as to why he did not receive punishment. He explained, “For my father, lying, cheating, and stealing are cardinal sins, so he believed I had committed one of those.”

Chad rationalizes that the absence of punishment indicated that he was perceived as having exhibited a certain degree of maturity in handling the situation. He concludes, “He and I never discussed it further. He did not even inform my mother.”

For the purposes of this discussion, I will limit my remarks to one additional case: that of Lance, who is currently 47 years of age. Lance and his partner had children from a previous marriage, and he was displeased when she informed him that she was not going to terminate their pregnancy. They subsequently separated, and a few weeks later, she changed her mind.

One must examine Lance’s remarkable evasions and self-deceptions. He is aware that he is the cause of her change of heart, yet he must exercise caution: “You cannot appear excessively jubilant about it.” Then, another turn of events: “And as a matter of fact, I was not particularly jubilant about it. Therefore, I was walking with great caution regarding this matter.”

Lance picks her up at the house

“and it had the feel of an execution, which is another reason I wanted to get it done when she first told me. Early on, it feels like it’s pregnancy, it’s just a thing, it’s not a person. But as weeks go by, you see more babies and pregnant women than you have ever seen in your life—you just see them everywhere.”

He is one of two individuals present at the abortion clinic. Lance’s conclusion is as follows:

“When they called her to come to the back, it was rough for me. I think it may have been about 45 minutes. She comes out and she had been crying, which of course was a really hard thing for me to see. We stared at each other, and she says, ‘OK, let’s go.’ I felt a sad relief. It was bittersweet. It doesn’t leave you.”

The following day, we will discuss the account of the third man and connect it to some of the accounts of the 26 women who have not been previously discussed.

A final observation for today is that the rationale behind the pro-abortionist strategy of “telling your story” is likely based on the assumption that, with some exceptions, the women (and men) involved do not appear to be completely heartless and unfeeling individuals who engage in abortions without any emotional distress.

However, it is my contention that the majority of individuals who are not aligned with either pro- or anti-abortion perspectives will likely reach a markedly different conclusion. Abortion is perceived as a traumatic and distressing experience, and the assumption that it can effectively address underlying issues is erroneous. Instead, it often exacerbates the original problem and leaves a profound emotional scar that is difficult to overcome.


Daniel Miller is responsible for nearly all of National Right to Life News' political writing.

With the election of Donald Trump to the U.S. presidency, Daniel Miller developed a deep obsession with U.S. politics that has never let go of the political scientist. Whether it's the election of Joe Biden, the midterm elections in Congress, the abortion rights debate in the Supreme Court or the mudslinging in the primaries - Daniel Miller is happy to stay up late for you.

Daniel was born and raised in New York. After living in China, working for a news agency and another stint at a major news network, he now lives in Arizona with his two daughters.

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