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The deep unhappiness that lies behind an assertion that “I wish my mother would have aborted me”

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The curious and deeply unhappy article was written under a pseudonym (Lynn Beisner), first appearing in a publication that self-identifies as a forum for those who are “dissatisfied with the limitations of deeply-embedded traditional gender roles” (Role/Reboot). The article attempts to challenge conventional narratives of redemption by presenting a narrative of maternal rejection and the desire for abortion. In sum, the article is a substantial one, comprising 1,486 words.

Upon reading the article in Tuesday’s Guardian newspaper, it became evident that a pro-abortion activist (as evidenced by her previous writings) would likely become enraged when women discuss their experiences of choosing life in challenging circumstances. Beisner, who is a pseudonym for a mother, a writer, a feminist, and an academic living somewhere east of the Mississippi River, finds such stories “offensive.”

Please elaborate on this assertion. The emotional blackmail inherent in these narratives is what renders them so infuriating. As readers or listeners, we are compelled by the anti-choice versions of A Wonderful Life to express sentiments of gratitude for the protagonist’s existence. Indeed, this is a valid point.

She acknowledges that even her most ardent pro-choice colleagues and friends become uneasy when she explains why she believes her mother should have terminated her pregnancy. Some individuals confuse the well-considered and rational argument that abortion is the best choice for both the mother and the child with the expression of depression and angst, which is often expressed as “I wish I had never been born.” The two are, in fact, quite distinct phenomena, and it is imperative that this distinction be clearly delineated. We will return to this point in a moment.

Although Beisner’s argument is complex and multifaceted, it ultimately follows a straightforward trajectory. (1) She had a particularly challenging upbringing, and that having an abortion would have been a preferable option for her mother (who also had an even more challenging life) and a more beneficial choice for Beisner; and (2) “The world would not be a darker or poorer place without me.” In terms of contributions to the world, I would be considered a net loss.

I must inquire as to the meaning of your words. “Everything that I have done, including parenting, teaching, research, and being a loving partner, could have been done as well, if not better, by other people,” Beisner informs us. “Any positive contributions that I have made are completely offset by the costs incurred by society in assisting me to overcome the disadvantages and injuries of my childhood and become a functional and contributing member of society.”

It is necessary for her to make a distinction for a number of reasons. Firstly, because the majority of people, or indeed almost all people, as she put it, react with shock and dismay at her assertion. Furthermore, she maintains that in order to maintain reproductive rights, it is necessary to be willing to share one’s experiences and to be able to articulate the desire to have been aborted.

To achieve this, she must portray her mother as a victim and herself as someone who would not have known anything (or only momentarily experienced pain) had she been aborted. Consequently, she wishes her mother had aborted her.

I am unaware of Beisner, but it is evident that her remarks are motivated by a sense of ultimate responsibility for her mother’s challenging life circumstances. It is therefore unsurprising that she is so angry at the suggestion that she could have done what she did just as well as she did. This is despite the fact that the basic premise of the film “It’s a Wonderful Life” is the very opposite of what she is suggesting.

The pro-life perspective is unified by a number of foundational principles. One of the primary connecting tissues is the recognition that we are not interchangeable parts; that each individual is unique; that each individual has a special contribution to make; and that the termination of one child’s life does not provide the opportunity for a “start over” through the birth of another.

It is a fundamental tenet of the pro-life perspective that the life of an individual, or that of a mother and child, can be beset with difficulties. I am personally acquainted with numerous individuals who have experienced similar circumstances. However, we are unwilling to suggest that killing is a solution to suffering. We are gratified, even if Beisner asserts otherwise, that she was assisted in overcoming the disadvantages and injuries of her childhood to become a functional and contributing member of society.

In his penultimate sentence, Beisner expresses his sadness at the fact that she was unable to find the courage and selflessness necessary to make the decision. However, it is noteworthy that her final statement is, “But my attitude is that as long as I am already here, I might as well do all I can to make the world a better place, to ease the suffering of others, and to experience love and life to its fullest.”

It is evident that she does not genuinely espouse the preceding 1,442 words. Furthermore, it is evident that she should cease to blame herself for these events, which have occurred over many years.


Daniel Miller is responsible for nearly all of National Right to Life News' political writing.

With the election of Donald Trump to the U.S. presidency, Daniel Miller developed a deep obsession with U.S. politics that has never let go of the political scientist. Whether it's the election of Joe Biden, the midterm elections in Congress, the abortion rights debate in the Supreme Court or the mudslinging in the primaries - Daniel Miller is happy to stay up late for you.

Daniel was born and raised in New York. After living in China, working for a news agency and another stint at a major news network, he now lives in Arizona with his two daughters.

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