How Do You Answer Your Teenage Daughter When She Tells You She’s Pregnant?

By Bryan Kemper

Bryan Kemper

How do you answer your teenage daughter when she tells you she’s pregnant?

I have spent close to 30 years standing outside abortion mills talking to men and women about alternatives to abortion, pleading with them to know that their child is a gift from God and no matter what got them in this situation their child is a blessing. When I first started to have kids I would bring them with me to pro-life events and dress them in pro-life t-shirts. I was the proudest father on the planet when my kids would ask me if they could protest abortion with me or ask me to help them write a paper in school about abortion.

I often talk to my daughters about how we must love everyone and make sure young girls who are scared know there is help for them and people who love them in their darkest hours. I witnessed my kids talk to people at our booths about how wrong abortion is and how every single child is a wanted child and needs to be welcomed in love.

I can honestly say that when they were young I never imagined that one of my own daughters would be that scared teenage girl who is terrified of telling her parents she’s pregnant. I just assumed that they would grow up, fall in love, get married and then have kids.

The day I walked into the hallway and saw my precious angel crying and afraid to tell me what I already knew was a difficult day. Not because I had to face the reality that my daughter is pregnant, but because I had to see that fear in her eyes and hear her say the words “Are you mad at me Dad?”

To be honest, anger was the last emotion I felt at that moment. I hugged my daughter tight and just told her I loved her. When she asked me if I was mad I said without hesitation, “NO! How can I be mad at you for blessing me with my first grandchild?”

Over the years I have talked to many kids from Christian homes, pastor’s daughters and even pastors themselves who were walking into abortion mills because they were afraid of how people would react. I have heard pastors talk about how they feared what their church members would say to find out their child got pregnant out of wedlock. I have heard young girls tell me they were afraid if their parents found out that they would be kicked out of the house and disowned. An angry father once threw me to the ground as he pushed his crying daughter into the abortion mill to make her have an abortion she didn’t want.

I am going to say something that may not sit well with many people; the abortion rate in churches is directly caused by those who forget the Mercy and Grace Christ shows us on a daily basis. It blows my mind that we would be more worried about hiding a sexual sin than accepting the gift of life. Instead of embracing the absolute grace of God we reject life itself destroy His image.

Pregnancy is not a sin; pregnancy is not a disease, and pregnancy is not something to ever be ashamed of. Every single child is a blessing from the Lord and should be welcomed and embraced with all the love in the world. When we react in anger and shame we reject grace and have forgotten the Divine Mercy Christ showed us when He gave His life for us. So many people choose to sacrifice the child to cover a sin that has already been paid for in full by the very God who gave created that child.

Editor’s note. This appeared at Life News and is reposted with permission. Bryan Kemper is the youth director for Priests for Life.